I Should Be Committed

I’m incredibly noncommittal. I’m not sure why. I only recently bought a cell phone with a contract. I don’t want to get tied to something I will have a hard time sticking with. What if I find a better phone plan a year from now? Life changes all the time. Sometimes drastically, significantly and in ways you’d never have imagined.

I’ve been considering marriage lately. I’m not so sure I can do it though. I don’t want to end up feeling that I want to chew my leg off and escape. That desperate feeling…I can still recall. I’ve been alone for almost twelve years now. I’ve had boyfriends in that time span and most recently a very good one for the past six years. But I’ve lived alone with my kids not even considering adding a man to the household. I don’t want the job of having to get along, or sharing in decisions…not to mention having to live up to my own standards.

It’s not that I’m unable to commit to anything…I just won’t commit to something if I have any doubts at all. When I commit, I am serious about it. And right now…I’m committed to my goals.

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